Is This the Opening You've Waited For?

There is a particular moment in life when the familiar begins to fall away.

The career or job that once defined your days is changing or coming to an end. The children who once needed so much of you need you differently now. A relationship, role, routine, or responsibility that occupied years of your life has shifted.

And suddenly, the road ahead looks… different.

Sometimes that feels liberating.

And, if we’re being totally honest, sometimes it feels terrifying.

And sometimes it feels like both before breakfast.

We’re accustomed to knowing what comes next. There is a schedule, a role, a responsibility, a clear destination. We know what we are supposed to do because, for so long, someone or something has helped define it.

Then one day, you realize:

The familiar is ending.

But that doesn't mean you are ending.

When there is no longer a well-worn path in front of you, it can be tempting to assume you are lost.

Far from it.

Now, there is wide open space. There is room. 

  • Room to reconsider what you want.

  • Room to discover what interests you.

  • Room to try something just because.

  • Room to create work, a passion, that fits the life you want to live.

  • Room to change your mind.

And yes, that kind of freedom can be overwhelming.

When there are fewer external expectations telling us what to do, the possibilities can feel almost too numerous. We become so accustomed to following someone else’s path that choosing our own direction feels like a much bigger undertaking.

Don't make it one.

Here’s what I’ve learned: You don't have to know the whole route.

You don't even have to choose the destination yet.

You can begin with curiosity. 

This may be one of the greatest privileges of this chapter.

You get to move at your own pace. Maybe you're ready to leap, to hit the gas and go. Maybe you're ready to experiment, to try, to test. 

Maybe you want to spend a season listening and noticing what catches your attention, or building something new, but slowly and thoughtfully.

There is no prize for rushing into the next chapter.

Sometimes growth means a willingness to pause. Becoming more honest about what you want. Sometimes it is finally giving an old dream some oxygen.

The important thing is that the choice is yours.

What if this isn't the end of something?

What if it is the beginning of having more say in what comes next?

More freedom.

More creativity.

More room for the parts of yourself that have been waiting patiently while other priorities took center stage. 

The end of something familiar can bring grief. It can bring uncertainty. It can bring the occasional What the heck am I supposed to do now? Here’s the good news: these feelings and questions are normal.

Think of this time as an extraordinary invitation.

Look around. What's possible now?

You don't have to answer immediately.

You simply have to be willing to look.

Because the road ahead isn’t empty.

It’s wide open.

Navigating the Unexpected

How do you navigate change when the waters turn murky and the way forward shifts without warning? You’re more in control than you think.

Clients, colleagues, and friends are adjusting to unexpected changes impacting their lives in immediate and unpredictable ways. If you enjoy life long enough, this is part of the journey. I have been there many times.

I used to believe I had no control over this. Now, I know how I think about these challenges will either slow or speed the arrival of my next opportunity.

With time and intention, we add skills, resources, and different ways of thinking to our toolbox. These skills help you process situations with grace, self-love, and determination. Know that on the other side of uncertainty are opportunities and new beginnings. Keep moving forward.

As Duke women’s basketball coach Kara Lawson says, “We learn to deal with hard better.”

When you find yourself navigating change, drop these two skills into your mental toolbox to guide you to your next opportunity:

Look through the lens of possibility. Revisit your past experiences, capture your milestone moments, and turning points. Look with an eye on the lessons and skills you extracted from both the good and the grind. Write down each skill you gained. What happened, and what skills translate to your next chapter? (Resilience, calm in crisis, project management?)

Adjust your perspective, not focused on an industry, company, or employer. Note all you gained that is useful and sets you apart - communication, problem solving, team leadership, or something else? Craft your unique founder story (Read more on this here.), meaning your foundation story, whether you’re entering a new job, career, or launching a business. Tell your story of inspiration and growth. Be proud of what you’ve accomplished, overcome, and learned.

Adopt “yes, and…” thinking, create a path forward. Acknowledge that things aren’t great, recognize you’re in the midst of sadness or challenges, AND that you can take one step forward. Don’t stop at rehashing circumstances; add the “and” to finish with what’s next: And, I can call a friend for help, write the email, brainstorm ideas, or rest. It’s a subtle shift that makes a big difference. You’re not dwelling on the situation; you open a way forward. Catch yourself next time you’re tempted to stop at the crisis thinking, add the “and” to see how it pulls you forward.

This isn’t the time to shrink. Stay the course, be proactive with what’s in your sights that inspires and elevates your thinking. Learning to navigate the unexpected will lead to your next vibrant chapter.